Question #1:
GREETINGS TO YOU ROBERT LUGINBILL! I first contacted you several weeks ago. I am still 76 years of age. I am living in a 1-bedroom apartment that will soon be completely remodeled. My rent will increase by 70%. The rental office is still 2 minutes away from my apartment. I now owe a few thousands of dollars for a past weekend spent in a local hospital (hospital visits are very expensive). I am expecting to begin working part-time in a local grocery store next week that is located across the street - 3 minutes - from my apartment. I wanted to share a few of my ups and downs that I am experiencing day by day. BOTTOM LINE - I will become very busy with your website. I will begin to read through the entire bible for the first time using the order of the books as presented on your website. I plan to spend some time each day with your website. I estimate that I will be kept busy with your website for most of next year - day by day. I am looking forward to 'learning', 'growing', and 'ministering' to others as opportunities become available. Your website is a precious 'gift' from FATHER GOD - I AM GRATEFUL TO YOU AND OTHERS WORKING WITH YOU - THANK YOU SO MUCH! Respectfully,
Response #1:
Ouch! Sorry to hear about your rent AND that you're having to work at
your age. Your encouraging attitude in spite of these setbacks is a
great witness, however, as is your determination to keep growing in the
Lord – good for you!
Thanks for all your kind words too, my friend. Keeping you in my prayers
daily.
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #2:
Hi Dr. Luginbill,
Apologies for not being in touch. Ichthys is still my church so to
speak, I've just had bad attendance lately. I've been struggling
spiritually, but I am trying to get back on track. I had some negative
thoughts that one should never have, questioning Our Creator at times,
and asking him to take me home once. Most of that darkness is behind me.
It's been I think 2 or 3 years since I was hospitalized with stomach
issues, and it continues to be a problem. It is much better now, but
because of my health a missed a lot of work and couldn't pay my
insurance deductible, so I've been uninsured since that hospital visit.
I haven't been able to go to the doctor much because of it, so I still
don't know what's wrong, but I am doing better than I was. I used to be
non-functional, now I can at least work and exercise again. I just have
no energy at times, stomach pains, and I'm also just worn down by life.
I went through a major ordeal back when I was drinking and recovering;
it took a lot out of me, and I always wanted just a little break (over 6
years sober now, praise Christ!). Just needed some good times so to
speak, I needed to rest. But things just haven't gone my way.
Through all of this there have been many blessings. For over a year now
I've been living in my dream house. It's nothing big; it's old and has
character. Real hardwood floors, tall ceiling. I have 6 acres of woods
with lots of big, old hardwood trees; white oaks, black walnut trees,
magnolias, dogwoods etc. I love it here. It's secluded but close to town
too. I also have a job now that's a perfect fit. It combines my IT
knowledge and experience with my installation knowledge and experience,
and the pay is good and I have plenty of down time, which helps when I'm
not feeling well. I still climb on roofs a lot, so I pray often for
safety.
I suppose my spiritual struggle has been that I don't see the good side
of this illness. I don't feel like I have grown spiritually during this
process, as most of my prayers for years were simply "help me." My
mindset has been that I need to prepare for the tribulation, but I need
energy to do so. I know objectively that The Lord can turn this into
some sort of blessing, but subjectively I can't imagine what good could
come from this, so it's often just depressing. If I healed tomorrow I
would be grateful of course, but still would have no idea what the
purpose of the illness was. I'm lonely as well and have essentially gone
through all of this without much human interaction. When I was in the
hospital a nurse asked if she could call someone to visit, and I thought
about it for a minute and said "no." I've often wondered if I'm "on the
spectrum" of autism, because I just don't relate to people and have to
learn certain things about social interaction on the internet or by
watching others. Some of that could be my divine perspective and hatred
of most worldly things, but since I quit drinking I'm not great with
small-talk or forming relationships.
I'm not complaining about any of this. Just letting you know where I am
with things. I still pray for you often.
I'm concerned about this new religion that's popping up everywhere. The
higher power seems to be "science" or "justice,", and it has it's clergy
and it's works, sacraments, ritual, heretics, etc. I find it ironic that
the people who would be most appalled by anything "puritanical" have
become their own version of puritans. They have regressed to a
puritanical legalism and call it progressive. They even have their own
witch hunts. What is discouraging is to see believers who think they are
doing good deeds by following the tenets of this new satanic religion.
James said that visiting the orphans and widows is pure and undefiled
religion, but this new religion says that visiting people is a germy
sin. The new passport systems are possibly creating an infra-structural
backbone for a mark. These are dark times; may we look to The Light.
In Christ,
P.S. I noticed that ___'s son is still on the prayer list. If any of my
knowledge or experiences in that department could prove useful, let me
know
Response #2:
Great to hear from you! Yes, I have been wondering about you, and
praying for you daily. I'm thrilled to hear about the job and home
situation. God is good! I know and know of plenty of people who don't
have either of those "ducks in a row", so I'm grateful to the Lord for
blessing you on both fronts.
When it comes to companionship, whether friendship or marriage, that is
an issue for almost all human beings – except perhaps for the very few
who are happily married (and even there that "happily" has its ups and
downs). Good friends are a rarity as well. Your disgust with the world
is the right attitude a believer should have, of course. Being a "friend
of the world" or "loving the world" are sure paths to spiritual ruin
(Jas.4:4; 1Jn.2:15-17). But it can be lonely to have that right
perspective. I've known drought and plenty in this area. The latter is
great, but challenges one's time and energy; the former is hard, but
does open up opportunities for spiritual growth.
So when you say, "I've just had bad attendance lately. I've been
struggling spiritually, but I am trying to get back on track", it's my
duty to remind you that spiritual growth is the solution to all things.
Because the truth is the solution to all things. I know you already know
a lot of it. But it's good to be reminded of it. AND be prompted to
remember it, believe it, and apply it.
Having a difficult test like the one you've been going through is a big
challenge, but the Lord always gives us at least one – and sometimes
more than one – of these big tests to help us break through to spiritual
maturity and beyond . . . and also to help us prepare for what's next.
Part of that "what's next" is ministry; part of it, for we who are
living on the cusp of the end, is the Tribulation.
I have been and will be praying for your health. I know you are as well.
God hears all of our prayers. The fact that He doesn't always answer
them immediately does not mean that He doesn't hear or doesn't care. It
DOES mean that He is "working it all out together for good". We don't
understand the "Why"? That is common. Our job is not to understand the
"Why?" Our job is to trust the Lord that there IS a very good reason for
everything that is happening. The plan of God is perfect because He is
perfect, so that all He is working out for us in our lives is perfect
too (Rom.8:28). That is not a natural thing to think; that can only be
accepted and believed and applied with faith and with the Holy Spirit.
Job got a ton of trouble which was not the result of any sin or ungodly
behavior on his part. He didn't understand "Why?" How could he, not
being privy to the first two chapters of the book of Job? And He did
trust God . . . for a long while. But He faltered when pressured by his
"friends", and was rebuked by the Lord for doing so. But then, of
course, the Lord completely restored him, all he had lost and his health
as well.
I'm no prophet, and so I can't say when or how the Lord will intervene
on your behalf or why He is "taking so long" by our lights. But I can
tell you that He is "worth waiting for".
I would strongly suggest that you re-read
the Peter series (at the link);
it's designed especially to encourage those who are suffering with
suffering which is undeserved. Rather than allowing ourselves to feel
bad when this happens, however, our job is to understand that we are
"sharing the sufferings of Christ" and glorifying Him . . . if we are
bearing up and trusting Him in the process.
I would also be happy to send a message to the moderator of the "Ichthys
Forum". I know that more than one reader of this ministry has made some
good friends and contacts thereon. It's not "face to face", but some
have found it helpful.
I promise to continue to do battle with you in prayer on this issue
until your victory.
In Jesus Christ our dear Lord and Savior,
Bob L.
p.s., yes, ___'s son is an alcoholic and has been bouncing off the
bottom for years now; IMHO it's a miracle he's still alive. I pray for
her and him daily too.
Question #3:
Thanks, Dr. Luginbill. It's good to hear from you too.
My parents sold their house back in July, just two days after they put
it on the market; and we had to be out of the house by the end of the
month. They had nowhere to go, and my aunt offered them a place to live.
They didn't want to sign a lease and be stuck for a year, so it seemed
like a good idea (I guess) to them at the time. They didn't think they
would be there very long.
I told them that they were crazy to live there, even it's for a short
time. I spent a small fortune staying at a hotel for two weeks while I
was waiting for my apartment to be ready just so that I didn't have to
stay with her. She kept asking me why I didn't stay at her place, and my
excuse was that it's too far from my work, which is the truth but not my
main reason for not wanting to stay there.
If all goes well, my parents won't have to live there much longer. They
put in an offer for a house in ___. The closing date is in December. My
dad is worried because it's the higher end of their price range. I hope
they just buy it so that they get away from my aunt. I told them that
I'll rent from them next year to give them some income when he's
retired.
I'm not flying anymore, but I do miss it. I did get a job offer, but I
ended up not taking it. It's a fun job, but not very reliable. The
schedule can be kinda crazy (waking up in a different city every day,
gone for days at a time, 12+ hour shifts on occasion). Plus the pay is
not good when you're first starting out as a flight attendant. I
wouldn't be able to afford to live on my own.
I've been working at a bank as a call center representative. It's not a
bad job. I make more here than I did at the airline. Soon they're going
to let me work from home, so I'll be able to live wherever I want once
my lease expires. I plan on moving in with my parents and renting from
them.
Sometimes I think about getting married, but haven't met anyone who
would be a good spouse. And then I'm worried about how much longer we
have until the Tribulation. I wouldn't want to have young children
during that time. But I will follow whatever the Lord wills for my life.
As far as the liver transplant, we wouldn't start planning that until
sometime next year. So hopefully they'll be settled somewhere by then. I
have sick time and vacation hours that I can use to schedule time away
from work. I'm going to talk to my manager about this once everything is
more concrete.
Thank you for listening to me. Your words are such a comfort to me. Once
I calm down, I'm able to focus on what matters. Life really isn't so bad
now. It's just hard with how my aunt is being right now, and it's hard
to remember that I'm trying to forgive her for everything.
But I have a good job, a safe place to live, and soon I hope my parents
will be settled in their new home. And after that, we'll be able to
schedule a surgery for a transplant and then she'll be back to normal so
that they can live happily ever after. That would be nice.
In Him,
Response #3:
Thanks for the clarifications. I was pretty sure there were "mitigating
circumstances", but if it were me, I'd have found something else.
Camping for a couple of weeks would seem to be better than what you
described in your previous email! People can be incredibly abusive in
the most hurtful possible ways. It takes a strong Christian to overlook
the sort of horrific behavior you report – but even strong Christians
are wise to stay away from such toxic situations if there is any
possible alternative.
I'll say a prayer for your parents to get into their new place quickly
and without too much trouble. That'll be good for you too, at least
financially. Good to hear that you'll be able to work from home.
Personally, I'm very happy to have an office to go to. I think the
stay-at-home thing was very detrimental to the mental health of many; I
KNOW it was for most of my students. Even the ones who came to campus
for my classes suffered from things being only partially normal. Not
that we're all the way back yet, either. They still have to wear masks
(I'm allowed to take mine off while I'm lecturing).
I hear what you're saying about the airlines. Don't know much about
banking (that's where they keep the money, right? Explains my
ignorance). But it seems like a potentially good career. If you're
planning to move up, I really think you might want to find a face to
face gig someplace close to your home-to-be up north.
I think your attitude towards marriage and a family is a good one,
namely, let the Lord bring you whatever He brings you. The truth in
scripture about the future is not meant to keep us from living each day
in a good and godly way, doing what we ought to do regardless, right
down to the end.
I keep you and your family in my daily prayers, my friend.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #4:
Hi Dr. Luginbill,
I'm glad that they're letting you teach in person again. I would prefer
that myself, but hardly anybody at my work is in the office anymore.
There's maybe 10-20 people that I see at the most working on my floor.
But there must have been at least 200-300 people at one point. It's even
worse on weekends. Sometimes the only other person I see is the security
guard at the front desk.
I figured since I hardly ever see anyone anyway, I might as well work
from home, save some gas money. But someday I'd like to go back to
working in an office, but I don't know if my department will ever go
back to "normal." It transitions so well to at-home work since all we do
is answer the phones all day.
I'm keeping you in my prayers as well.
In Him,
Response #4:
It really is a "weird" world at present. I have a significant number of
students who have shared with me that they are having mental problems
and even being hospitalized for them. This was never the case before.
Less than 10% back in the office is hardly "back to normal" in the case
of your work. Hard to see how that "works" long term. I'm very skeptical
about the supposed increased productivity that allegedly comes from
"working at home". If it were my business, I would be very reluctant to
go that route. And I know it's not that good for the mental health of
those who are doing it. It's like being on a flight to Mars or something
like that, even if you are careful to take steps to get out of the house
in other ways. I'm sure your parents are great, but there's nothing
better than being on one's own – if you can swing it.
I'm keeping you and your family in my prayers daily.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #5:
Dr. Luginbill,
I recently noticed that you spoke of an online forum for like-minded
Ichthys participants. I would love to throw my hat into the ring, if
that's possible.
Sincerely,
Response #5:
Great to hear from you!
I just sent an email to the forum moderator. Give him a little time, but
if you haven't heard from him by next week, let me know and I'll remind
him.
Hope you're doing well!
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #6:
Thank you so much for letting me know.
I know, with all of the people you correspond with, that you can't
possibly remember me; however, we have communicated twice, in the past.
Although your ministry has always been especially helpful, I usually
tend to wander astray for a while, and then return. The last
communication I had with you, I queried the possibility of some sort of
threaded bulletin board or forum. I won't drag you through the details
but imagine my surprise to return to the fold and learn that there is
some sort of thing available.
I am thrilled at the prospect of what could possibly lie ahead,
perchance some sort of aid to my physical and spiritual isolation (I am
now disabled and have very little human contact in real life).
As always, I wish you well, and try to remember to pray for you as often
as I can.
Response #6:
I do remember you, though not that particular conversation. That was a
long time ago, I think!
I don't participate in the forum myself (has to do with allowing Ichthys
readers the space to talk freely among themselves), but I know it's been
a blessing to many, so I hope you'll enjoy it too.
I thank you for your prayers. I'm sorry to hear that you're disabled and
that this has (understandably) created isolation. I will say that it's
not uncommon for all readers of Ichthys to feel and be isolated: when
the Lord and His truth are your life, well, let's just say that in the
era of Laodicea it's pretty difficult to find other Christians who feel
the same way.
I would be happy to put a prayer request up for you at Ichthys.
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #7:
Good Morning, Dr. Luginbill,
I have vacillated continuously about how to reply to your email. It may
seem silly but I think that you will understand.
Obviously, I was thrilled to get a personal response from you. Just like
many of your acolytes, I want to interact with you and your ministry;
however, I do not wish to fill up your inbox with a lot of "stuff" that
just adds more to your workload.
You see, I have been extremely curious my entire life and enjoy research
and academia so I do not receive any type of news, opinions, or theology
without completely vetting my sources (based on prior experiences in my
life).
Around 2008-2010, I was having a spiritual crisis of sorts. I wanted to
know if I believed what I believed because it was my belief, because my
parents told me to believe, or if the church told me to believe. I grew
up in an extremely strict pentecostal/charismatic denomination and have
seen and heard many things. Not only was I regularly taught that
basically everything was a sin but also that I could backslide at any
given moment if I sinned and died before I remembered to repent. I have
personally witnessed the casting out of demons (which was completely
terrifying), speaking in tongues and the subsequent message, or
prophecy, that was spoken to the church. I have also witnessed speaking
and tongues and prophecy on a personal level. When I was a late teen to
early twenties, I was going through something that was so painful and
difficult that I could not seem to get past it, no matter how hard I
tried. So for the one and only time in my life, I called the most
respected prophet in our church and asked if we could pray together to
see if God had anything to share. It was agreed and I went to the
prophet's home. I did not share anything about my situation and we knelt
together to pray. Within a few minutes, the prophet began to speak in
tongues. A few minutes later, the prophet spoke the message (in the King
James verbiage, by the way). The message was so specific and extremely
germane to my situation that I was literally taken aback for a few
minutes. The Creator of the universe took time out of His busy day to
speak to me, individually! This message was so profound that it has
followed me all of my life and has been a comfort to me in times of
distress.
Back to 2008-2010, I found myself in such a spiritual conundrum that I
was questioning everything about God and especially His existence, at
all. I was purchasing theological textbooks and researching on the
internet when I found Ichthys and you. I felt a connection with what I
read and your academic credentials buoyed my faith and trust in what you
had to say - until I read your eschatological views and the component,
or lack thereof, regarding the rapture of the church. My mind was
completely blown! How had I never been confronted with this topic
before? Why was this coming at me in the midst of my queries regarding
Christianity and the existence of God? I spent a great deal of time
reading, reflecting, praying and then I finally mustered up the courage
to approach you with my comments and questions. To my delight, I found
you to be extremely responsive, patient, kind, and my not feeling as
though you were pushing your theology on me; just giving me facts, as
you saw them, and your continual refrain to go back to the Bible and see
for myself. It was a huge moment in my life.
I fell into another crisis around 2014-2016. One of epic proportions and
I could not see up from down. I was diagnosed with mental illness and
taken off of work. For twelve months, I was in deep
psychiatric/psychological treatment and the diagnoses kept coming fast
and furious. I demanded that this was not true and that I was going back
to work. I was told that I would never work again and that I was a
severe psychiatric patient with several diagnoses (up to thirteen at
last count). I cried, I screamed, I prayed and insisted that I was not
sick and that I was going back to work. Out of sheer desperation, it was
during this maelstrom that I connected with you again. Because of my
charismatic background, I communicated with you about spiritual
attack/oppression and spiritual warfare. Once again, you were very kind,
responsive, and assistive. You did not discount my belief system in the
spiritual realm and you gave me advice based on scripture. You did not
use absolute terminology but you did not discount that I "might" be
facing spiritual oppression. If my memory serves me correctly, you said
that before you sent the email, you had prayed about me, you had prayed
about my email, and that you had reflected on my situation. I took your
advice, going back to the Bible and reading specific relevant passages
provided. I found great comfort in my correspondence with you. It was
during this timeframe that I brought up the topic of your site and the
possibility of an online forum. A long time ago and in a land far, far
away; I was actually a professional web developer. I was so grateful for
your ministry that I wanted to help. I offered to provide server space
for you and any other needs that you might have or desire. As usual, you
were very kind and very nice when you spoke about how everyone has a
gift/ministry and that this one was your ministry. You actually posited
that maybe an online forum for Christians might be in my wheelhouse. I
obviously discounted that I could have any kind of ministry in my
present state and moved on with my awful situation.
I continued to denounce my illness but my doctors refused to write me a
letter to go back to work unless I made some professional concessions.
Before I became ill, I was a nurse executive with responsibility for the
entire nursing division of an entire hospital. The only way that I was
allowed to return to work was under the constraints of moving to an
entry level job, first. Between my healthcare team and the hospital, I
was given the job of ER admissions clerk. I was completely deflated and
embarrassed. This was a job that only required a high school diploma and
I completely felt like this was the cruelest joke on the planet. The
primary responsibility of this job was to greet the patient, ask for
identification, type them into the computer and then hand them off to
the RN. In between patients, I had to look up their insurance, bill the
correct one, and completely add all their information into the database.
That's it. Unfortunately, my healthcare team was right. I couldn't do it
and was quickly removed from the easiest job in the hospital. Now,
completely humiliated, I had to exit the hospital knowing that I could
never return, and others knew, too. After I got in my car, I had a
complete breakdown and couldn't even remember where I lived. It took me
hours to get home.
From that day forward, physical conditions started piling on and now my
body is just as broken as my brain. Social Security gave me permanent
disability benefits in 2018, and they backdated my disability as being
2015 - the last day I walked out of the hospital from that ridiculously
menial position. Just so you know, 87% of all disability applicants are
denied their first SSDI application. My first one was approved, so now,
it is official. I am disabled, forever. My days are filled with no
purpose, no reason to get out of bed, no reason why I should not return
to bed and few human connections.
Sorry for dragging you through all of this but I selfishly wanted to
remind you of how you helped me. After all these years, I still find
your ministry beneficial which is why I pray for you whenever I can
remember. I would happily accept an addition to your prayer request
section.
Thank you - Sincerely,
Response #7:
I've put up a prayer request for you. Let me know if you want this
changed in any way, and I'm happy to do so.
I'm very sorry to hear of all your troubles! You have really been
through the ringer. I don't have any special knowledge about
psychological maladies, but I will say that they seem to be expanding
nowadays in types and occurrences almost exponentially. When I started
at U of L over three decades ago, and during my extended time in
graduate school and service before that, there were occasional cases of
individuals who developed severe problems, but now, it's a very rare
class where I don't have a student who drops out or is hospitalized or
needs time off for this reason – and sometimes multiple students in a
single class. No doubt satanic attack is involved in a good many cases.
No doubt too this is a sign of the impending end times.
One thing I do know is that nothing is impossible for the Lord. He does
answer prayer. And I will be praying for you, my friend.
Here's hoping too that you make some good connections on the forum!
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #8:
Good Morning, Dr. Luginbill,
Thank you very much for your reply and for your addition to the prayer
page. Your wording is most appropriate. And thank you so much for your
personal prayers; they are greatly appreciated. I do hope to make some
connections on the forum and am excited about the prospect.
Just two last questions:
1) I've only been back on the site for a couple of months and I believe
that I caught the tail of a very lively discussion about the vaccine for
covid and I saw a mention or two regarding the possible timing of "the
end", so to speak. I can't seem to find where this topic began or if it
is in your teaching materials. Are you able to point me in the right
direction?
2) I have briefly seen a whiff of discussion regarding the works/gifts
of the Holy Spirit not being available in our historical time and also
the possibility of this being demonic. Because I've only seen a couple
of comments, I could be completely mischaracterizing this topic. Again,
can you point me to your teaching materials or where this topic began in
the weekly email discussions?
Response #8:
Apologies for the late response: yesterday was "posting day" and I
rarely have time to get to emails.
1) There has been a great deal about this subject. It's all to be found
in the "Eschatology Issues"; back issues listed on the email page under
"previous postings" (at
the link). This started to be discussed as early as # 31 (at
the link) and I just posted #81, so a lot of reading to do!
2) Best place for this is BB 5: Pneumatology;
see especially
"spiritual gifts" (at the link). It is true that this topic comes up
a lot in the emails too. Searching through
"Ministry and Preparation for Ministry" series will probably yield
the best results (link is to the latest one).
Thanks for your prayers, my friend! You're on my personal list now as
well.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #9:
Thank you so much, Dr. Luginbill,
Like most others, I wait in anticipation for Sunday's when I am afforded
the luxury of reading your emails/responses. Honestly, it's hard for me
to fathom that you were able to reply to me as quickly as you did. So I
thank you for that.
Yes! A lot of reading to do, but I'm more than happy to proceed. I thank
you for pointing me in the right direction. I look at it this way - Hey,
now I have homework ;-)
[May] The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the
fellowship of the Holy Spirit, be with you. (2 Corinthians 13:14 NASB)
Thank you so very much and I continue to lift you up in prayer. Your
ministry is so profound that I want to make certain that you are able to
continue but balance is always necessary. Obviously, you have a
time-intensive job and a personal life.
As Paul prayed for the Corinthians:
[May] The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the
fellowship of the Holy Spirit, be with you. (2 Corinthians 13:14 NASB)
Sincerely,
Response #9:
My pleasure,
Thanks for the kind words too.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #10:
Hi Professor Luginbill,
It seems like we don't have normal things that were common throughout
history, and so substitute superversions fakes/fantasies of those things
to make up for it. No family or friends so watch a lot of TV and do
social media. No marriage so porn and literary smut. No stable families
so you get it from fake characters on TV. TV shows have long time life
long friends characters that rarely happen in real life. Video games
instead of real world goals. Superheroes beloved by many people who do
the bare minimum in life (sometimes not even that). I mean not everyone
of course is like this. But for a very large portion, if not the
majority, it seems to be this. Wouldn't it be better to have the real
version (even if it seems less good at first, it seems more good in the
end because at least it is real, in my opinion), of these than the fake
superversion fantasies?
Do you think I am overegging the pudding on this? I mean is it just in
my head? I am not leaving myself out. There is a thing or two on that
list I struggled with before.
It is demoralizing and depressing. What a life we moderns lead. But it
is hard to go it alone and get neither the real nor the fake. Just
wondering if it seemed like that to you too.
I guess I am thinking about it: and throughout history I am sure there
were plenty of people without some of those common things. I don't think
they had the super-fantasy fakes to turn to. I guess I am asking myself
if it is pathetic to do that now. Maybe also because I think the
existence of those is in the way of the real thing.
Response #10:
The world has always been a horrible place – from a spiritual point of
view. One only has to look at most of Israel's history pre-exile to see
how even the "people of God" gave themselves over to idolatry for the
most part (and to legalism after the exile). So it shouldn't come as any
great surprise that people today who are not part of God's unique nation
would be embracing and immersing themselves in vanities. If it was
somewhat different in the past, that is mostly because of lacking
similar opportunities. Today many people in this country have more spare
time than ever before, and through technology more opportunities to
indulge in the sort of nonsense you list here.
But we who belong to Jesus Christ don't need to be upset by that or by
the world generally. We know that it's all just dust and that it's all
going to be incinerated very shortly – in God's way of thinking about
time. Besides, our Lord will be back VERY soon. Even then, however, the
good we'd expect out of people will only exist because of divinely
imposed law and order. Just as soon as the population of the Millennium
gets a chance, they too will rebel against all that is right and good (link).
Our job is to keep ourselves pointed in the right direction and make
spiritual progress day by day, regardless of what the world thinks – and
regardless of what is going on in it.
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #11:
Just one more thing! I would like to get your opinion on something, please
correct my thinking if I am wrong in this...
I saw a post by a manager who was saying that an employee nearly messed up a
presentation with one of their customers. The employee said they got overwhelmed
with the work. And the manager was upset that the employee did not ask for help.
That is micro-managing for the manager to watch out for the employee taking on
too much. And I get what that manager is saying, but here is what I think: the
manager should know what tasks the employee has. So they should know if that
employee has taken on more work than is reasonable. To my experience, most
managers only want employees to say what they want and not say what they don't,
and will twist your arm if you imply that the work is too much (even if this is
true and you can prove it!) or something like that. So employees are stuck with
limited responses to bad situations the managers might put them in. Hence my
conclusion earlier.
Some managers say they are just blunt and to the chase, but many times these
managers are only so when it benefits them. They can insult you and curse at
you, being blunt, but you cannot do the same even in your own defense or you can
get in trouble for insubordination/disrespect, etc. This manager seemed like the
type to think that since they use that as it suits them they are more effective.
And I don't think so, but that is something else. But on what I wrote on my
thinking earlier, am I wrong? I ask because I apply this to myself and am
wondering if I am okay doing so.
Response #11:
This is the world. We have to remember that people are people – with sin natures – and most often motivated by the evil one and various aspects of his system. It takes a person of integrity who is devoted to the truth that God has made obvious in the world, His system of law and nationalism, to rise above the petty concerns and personal lusts that motivate most people. That sort of person is becoming increasingly rare, so it's not surprising that anyone in authority is likely to act in various dishonorable ways. It takes a pretty strong culture of accountability and focus on principles of reasonable behavior in any organization to keep these sorts of people in check. If the organization is loose in its culture, then it is inevitable that people will rise to positions of authority who are checked neither by the organization nor by any sense of personal integrity. I have seen this a lot.
If you see oppression of the poor and perversion of justice and righteousness in the province, don’t be astonished at the situation, because one official protects another official, and higher officials protect them.
Ecclesiastes 5:8 CSB
What is a believer to do? Keep doing his/her job as unto the Lord –
letting the Lord sort it all out. He never ever lets us down.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #12:
I went shopping today at a lot of stores and bought some pretty
Christmas decorations. Do you know I observe myself taking a lot of
pleasure in them and I am afraid.
Did I ever tell you I used to throw away good things I owned, because I
was afraid of the pain of losing them, so I beat the loss to the punch
so to speak? I am not sure where it originated. It is true I bounced
from house to house as a child. And at my adopted parents house they
would punish me by taking everything out of my room, even the bedframe,
and making me earn it back one my one (do please keep in mind that they
were very strict and harsh, punishing me for nonexistent or minor things
in that way as far as I can tell). So I never really had my own secure
possessions. I mean I didn't even have a home. Then in college I had to
throw things away because I couldn't carry it when I moved. Anyway I
have slowly unlearned that. It is like unlearning cutting yourself.
Back to what I was saying, I am afraid when I do have these relatively
secure possessions and enjoy them. I am just now getting to the point of
being able to relax and enjoy in that way, and am afraid of my reaction
if it is taken from me, if you see what I am driving at. I mean I do
trust God to get me through. I just feel shaky. And wonder if I am not
better off living more Spartan like? I don't know what I meant to ask
you, I just wondered if you had any encouragement.
Response #12:
Sorry for the delay – posting day yesterday and just now getting dug
out.
You had a rough time of it, my friend! I'm very pleased to hear that
the Lord has blessed you now. I don't think you should feel bad about that.
As long as we remember that the Lord is the source of our blessings, and
as long as we understand that He is our only true security down here, I
don't think we should feel the least bit guilty about this sort of
thing.
It's also good to remember that we have a LOT of good to look forward
to, even if we were to lose everything in this life. This world does not
last forever in any case; but the kingdom which is coming will be
everlasting, with permanent blessings which can never be taken away from
us no matter what.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #13:
The Lord is in control of everything that happens, yes? then why doesn't He stop the Tribulation and Antichrist from happening? how is such a horrific thing perfect, part of a perfect creation
Response #13:
Couldn't you make this objection about anything? "Why did God let my __
die?" "Why did God let __ tragedy happen?" "Why did God let me stub my
toe?" "Why oh why, God, why?"
People are always asking this question instead of seeking God. But time
is a test and it must take place as it is taking place. You don't think
so? Then WHY did the Father have to subject the Son to pain we cannot
imagine, since dying for the least sin of one single person was more
intense than all of the pain ever suffered in this world, past, present
or future . . . unless it had to be this way as part of the perfect plan
to SAVE us.
Question #14:
Dear Teacher
How have you been, Sir?
I am very sorry that I have taken this long to say my thanks for the
answer that you gave me in your last email. It was a big help.
Two bits of news:
One, I was supposed to get a final medical evaluation of the
pericarditis that you know about yesterday. I did get it kind of. The
doctor who saw me at the teaching hospital may be the head of the
cardiology department. At any rate, he is a professor and everyone else
in the cardiology unit appeared to answer to him. He had asked me to run
some tests the last time I kept my appointment with the unit three
months ago, so I did. His evaluation is that I had no signs of
inflammation (suggesting to me that I had never really needed to treat
pericarditis); rather I have a condition called pectus excavatum. My
chest has a small depression that I have never thought much of but which
has been there for as long as I can remember. He said that it has
resulted in something called a pancake heart. My sternum grew inwards
apparently and is affecting the positioning of my heart. So, he says
that I should listen closely to my body especially when doing anything
physical so that I don't push myself to dangerous limits.
Apparently, this is why I get tired quite easily. I grew up thinking I
was lazy, as I told you, because I got tired so easily (my older sister
confirmed this last night when I gave her the news too) and I was told a
lot that I was lazy too. If it hadn't been for you, I would be
struggling with a very heavy burden of guilt every time I get tired like
that. Interestingly, when I reminded my mom about a story that my dad
told about not being able to get a job that he interviewed for when he
was younger because the medical evaluation said that he had "murmur of
the heart" at that time -- something that he thought was an invention
for a move to deprive him of a job that he was qualified for in the
interest of tribal politics -- she added that he said that he had to
stop several times on his way there to catch his breath or something.
So, it might be a genetic thing that I inherited from him.
The doctor told me to come in every three months going forward to be
evaluated so that they can catch anything that can go wrong in time. He
did tell me not to panic though, but it appears that I'm now officially
a perpetual out-patient. I did look the condition up online and it seems
that with age, it can make functioning harder because you get tired and
breathless more easily. Apparently, the only solution is surgical.
Two, as I said, for the first time, the programming thing is going
really well. It's not stressing me out like it used to. I don't find
myself trying to hold it up with a lot of rules and really painful
discipline. I am enjoying the learning process. I did have to figure out
my own curriculum and the system I should use to learn. That took a
little bit, but I think that what I decided upon is working really well.
I haven't written a line of code since I started but that doesn't bother
me for once. I have been focusing on understanding what's happening
first and that is helping me get into the mindset of a programmer. I
have tried the "copy what I code" method before and ended up completely
confused and frustrated about what was happening. This time, my approach
is to study the fundamental concepts, then watch someone code and try to
make sense of what they are doing (by asking questions wherever I have
the opportunity to do so or just thinking through it and researching
anything that might help me understand what they are doing), then try to
write code using all that knowledge so that I can identify where I am
lacking in knowledge or understanding of the whole thing. I'm currently
doing the second bit of watching someone code. The videos I am finding
online are not everything I want, but I am starting with one that is at
least giving me some clues.
I do remember that I wanted to say that I do agree with you that I am
ready for ministry as far as training goes. I was rearing to go in the
past, but I have learned since then that I can be patient until the Lord
gives me work to do. I have considered that there is considerable chaos
in my life (the past couple of months has been amazing in my development
though) and there is much that I could still be trained in at the
moment. I am not thinking that I shouldn't start a website of my own or
be zealous to start training other believers, rather I am thinking that
maybe there is a reason that I feel held back a bit. On the Zoom
meetings and our WhatsApp group, I am enjoying ministering to my
brothers and sisters who share Ichthys with me, and I am trying to
continue doing that on the Ichthys forum although there is very little
activity there at all. I also remain open to help anyone that happens my
way. But it seems to me that this period that I am using to straighten
out a lot of the issues in my life (work, relationship with my fiancée,
family, and even integrating the right way into society) is working out
as training for me too. The feeling that I did not know how to think
about life or about my responsibilities to the Lord, to my fiancée, to
my family, and to the larger society is gone. In short, I don't feel
chaotic anymore. I don't feel like I'm trying to force myself into a
mold whether of my own making or of the world's making. I feel like I'm
being poured into a natural mold, somewhere I fit and belong to and it
isn't stressing me out anymore although, of course, it's not happening
without pain.
Finally, for the past few months (since September), I have been going to
something that the Methodist Church here in Nigeria calls a preaching
station, a new church that a few members of an old one start for various
reasons. In this case, the church was started for those living in the
area where I live since the main church is all the way in the heart of
town where the last crisis occurred and where the crisis often gets
really bad when it happens within the metropolis. We don't have a formal
preacher assigned to the new church yet, so we take turns to "preach."
First, I somehow managed to get them to accommodate discussions of
whatever is "preached" for the day during the service. Then, every time
that it is my turn, I turn it into proper teaching. In fact, I am using
the opportunities I get to work through Ecclesiastes. They haven't tried
to throw me out yet, so it is not so bad. On the Zoom meeting, I have
also been working through the discussion on politics, I should mention.
So, there are two fronts for ministry that the Lord has been gracious to
give to me.
As I thought, this ended up being a long email. I had meant to just say
my thanks and apologize for going so long without offering a response to
your last email, Sir. I will try to use the rest of my evening
productively after this.
Keeping you in our prayers here, Sir
Your student in Jesus Christ
Response #14:
Great to hear from you, my friend!
I'm happy to hear that things are progressing for you on all fronts,
even if there is "shot and shell" to navigate. I don't pretend to know
much about the programming aspect of things, but you are "working the
problem" and that is of course necessary to get good at anything. The
way you are approaching it is no doubt better than formal education
where so much is only theoretical. Better to get out there and actually
do it yourself. Have you got a program idea? I know you had some in the
past. Seems to me that actually writing one from top to bottom would be
the best way to master the ins and outs – but again, this is not my
field.
You have come a long way, my friend. I'm thrilled to hear that you're
getting an opportunity to teach the Word in person. That's all to the
good for many reasons. We won't speculate about the reaction. When you
teach the truth, the reaction is usually negative – except from a small
group of people who are happy to hear the truth (most are not, of
course, even in "churches").
I am distressed to hear of your medical condition. I don't know anything
about that either, but what you say makes sense. I'm at least glad that
you now know 1) it's not your fault; and 2) your physical limits – so
you don't make the bad mistake of trying to "push through" when your
body is telling you to stop. This is on my prayer list now as well.
As to you and your fiancée, I know that the Lord is working this out for
the good. This is all just one more uncertainty test for you. You'll
have to trust Him on your health, your marriage, your emigration, your
work/job, in short, with your whole life. But that is a good thing. We
are all totally dependent on the Lord. Even when our material
circumstances seem secure, that is really just an illusion; we need to
always keep in mind that without Him, our lives would be over in the
blink of an eye (not to mention that they would be pointless). Tests of
the sort you are going through are never fun, but they at least have the
advantage of helping those who are willing to walk closer with the Lord
than otherwise – because we are constantly aware of how much we need
Him.
Keeping you both in my daily prayers. Thanks so much for yours!
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #15:
Thank you Bob! Yes indeed it really is wonderful!
It was doubly shocking though yesterday. When I say doubly, on the one
hand I was overjoyed and amazed at the dramatic deliverance our Lord and
Saviour Jesus Christ gave to us yesterday but at the same time I was
really tripped up by other people's reactions to it. What I mean is that
I was overjoyed and celebrating and giving thanks and the people around
me (most notably ___ and the neighbour on the other side) were
horrified!
__ could see that I was praising the Lord and very amazed by what was
happening but he was quiet and dumbstruck and didn't know how to react.
When we got outside of the house the next door neighbour who knew what
was going on but didn't want to involve the police but wanted to do a
deal with the drug gang was horrified. She actually said that she was
crying as the police lead the man away in handcuffs. She kept saying
over and over again "I didn't want this to happen!" So she didn't want
to be delivered from this situation, she wanted to deal with it her own
way which was to cut a deal with criminals. This is a person whose two
children under the age of ten were sleeping next door to where the drugs
were grown and went to school smelling of cannabis.
She was horrified that the police arrested the man and was deeply
distressed about what would happen to him in police custody. She said
she didn't care about the drugs. When I tired to explain that houses
have burnt down when these operations have siphoned off power supplies
illegally, she didn't want to believe it was true.
I went out with ___ in the afternoon and I was saying how I couldn't
understand her reaction at all but ___ started to defend her and then
later he seemed angry about what had happened. He then said that he
didn't care about the drugs either and that I was the only person who
cared about it and made out that I had made a mountain out of a molehill
and he has argued me and defended my neighbour and now won't speak to
me!
I am now crying about it as I am really confused what is happening to
me! Justice was served and yet now I am being attacked for saying that!
Today I should be rejoicing but instead I am crying because it seems as
though the enemy has launched an attack on me immediately on the tails
of being delivered! It seems as though he doesn't want this deliverance
to help my faith and instead wants to mar it so that I associate it with
something bad rather than something good.
It's as though people are saying evil is good and calling evil good.
I feel a bit all over the place now emotionally. Is it usual to have a
fierce spiritual attack on the heels of a spectacular deliverance?
In Him,
Response #15:
That really is bizarre. But we live in a bizarre world, after all,
infected by sin and run by the devil through his sinful system. Being
appalled at justice is just one symptom of the fact that this satanic
system has been making real progress. That is to be expected in the run
up to the Tribulation, after all, but of course it is disheartening to
see and hear for those of us who love the truth.
The thing about this bizarre reaction is that it involves not that area of
biblical truth designed for believers only (and for those willing to
respond to the gospel so as to be saved), but the basic truth of life
God has instilled in every human being and writ large on His creation.
My old mentor Col. Thieme called this "the laws of divine
establishment". Whatever one calls this, law and order, justice, and
basic nationalism (not jingoistic hyper-patriotism but a recognition of
the evils of internationalism) is the glue that keeps human beings from
destroying themselves, individually and collectively. When this starts
to evaporate, there is no end to the evil and distress which will
result.
That is a main reason why the Tribulation, under the unjust and
international rule of the beast, will be so terrible. The fact that
people around the globe (not just in your country) are trending in that
direction merely tells us that "all this" cannot last much longer. From
one point of view, that is a good thing: Mara na tha! On the
other hand, while sweet in the mouth, it's also going to be very bitter
in the stomach for those of us who have to go through it. We have to
make sure that we keep looking over the turbulent sea to the blessed
shore beyond.
And they will say on that day, "Behold! This is our God! We waited in hope for Him to deliver us. This is our Lord. We waited in hope for Him. Let us rejoice and be glad in His deliverance!"
Isaiah 25:9
Strengthen the hands that are weak. Bolster the knees that are giving way. Say to those with anxious hearts, "Be strong! Don't be afraid! Behold! Your God will come, as an Avenger. [Your] God will come, as a Rewarder. He will come, and He will deliver you".
Isaiah 35:3-4
I'm happy that at least you have law enforcement that's still
functioning over there, even if there are many people who would prefer
anarchy (until it breaks down their own front door).
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #16:
Good afternoon Robert,
Life here has changed for us. We have been given notice of eviction and
have to be out by July 31st. Not much time. __'s boss laid him off and
now has talked his parents into kicking us out. We haven't had any
confrontation with them at all so this has come to be very surprising.
Just last month they approached us about raising rent, we agreed. When
they came up to visit they showed up with big smiles on their faces and
we set out on the lawn in our chairs and visited for 30 minutes. It was
good and great conversation like it has been for 3 years since we have
been there tenants. We have always paid our rent on time and had such a
great relationship the last year of renting was completely all
verbal..no contract. We never even put down a rental deposit. They
trusted us we trusted them.
After 30 minutes of chatting their tones changed and they said they had
a problem and that they are selling and we need to be out on July 31st.
No asking if that would work for us or nothing. She immediately had me
sign a paper of notice, which I did. I asked if they had a buyer for the
home and they smiled and said yes. ___ was upset because long story
short ___ wouldn't lie for him regarding ___'s unemployment. So ___ laid
him off and everything has gone down hill since. Now ___ is buying our
house to give to his 19 year old son and kicking us out.
We went down and got the mail last night to find an eviction notice from
an attorney in our mail box. It had been sent certificate receipt
signature required. Looks like the mailman made a mistake and it got
stuck in the mailbox instead of giving to us. What a shock to see the
extreme they have gone too for no reason. Kinda funny actually.
We have learned the extreme side of how evil knows how to cover-up in
such a nice way....and yet so deceiving.
On an another note we had a situation with my brokerage last week as
well. Long story short I have found that they aren't good people as
well.
All I can say is thank goodness we got kicked out so we can head them
off for sometime. I'm so tired if being deceived. I seriously can't
trust anyone anymore. I did have a vision go through my head when I met
my broker back in January. Its hard to explain but I saw her sitting in
a big chair (she is a big person) with all this purple clothing she was
wearing and make up galore with gold jewelry just cackling away. I'm
sure you have to be laughing because I did. Now I can kinda see
something after our incident we had a week ago. I'll have to tell you
about it someday.
Unfortunately we are in "round 2" now of having no home, but this time
I'm working and have a few things under contract and ___ is getting
unemployment for just a bit longer.
The world is changing and I can see things moving in the Lord's
direction. It's very obvious he is moving us, it's hard and not easy but
I trust him.
I'm just praying this doesn't last long and we know what direction we
need to go.
We are so relieved to finally be released from ___. The sacrifice of no
home is so worth it.
Thank you my friend for being there for us and helping us grow
spiritually. This hurdle would have been impossible without it.
Someone asked me the other day why I was so nice, she said you are too
nice. I told her I loved Jesus and she said but we all do... laughing. I
said then you must be nice too!! She didn't say anything else.
Hope you are doing well with all this craziness in the world. We know
this is nothing compared to what's to come real soon.
I do need to go, packing away... mostly giving away. Lol
Response #16:
I'm sorry to hear this! I have been praying that when you did move on
it'd be for a good purpose; I'm hoping that such is the case. Sounds as
if you are "well out" of this relationship, even if its an unexpected
dislocation. As a realtor, I'm sure you have a better idea than most
about what will work going forward.
I'll continue to pray for you guys and your family. We know that God has
a plan here, and that He is working it out for good. That doesn't mean,
of course, that the "good" always "feels good" in the here and now. But
looking back we can always see that it was. The fact that you are
already seeing some of that now is an indication of your spiritual
growth.
If you've been reading the recent email postings you have an idea of
what's going on here. I'm relieved to know that I'll be able to teach
most of my classes mostly face to face in the fall (of '20). Things will
be different, but – apparently – the worst of what might have happened
has been avoided. Of course this still all depends on how the powers
that be react to Covid numbers should they go up. Otherwise, Louisville
is beginning to open up. Eating places and some retail shops are lagging
but the trend is in the right direction. I still can't get books out of
the library until July, so that is a headache in trying to do my
research without all the tools I need. What the future will bring, we'll
have to see. I guess we're all in that boat – you and your family much
more than some others – but in fact of course that is always the case.
The Lord gives us one day at a time and no more. It's an illusion to
think otherwise. We just have to keep carrying our cross today "as long
as it is called 'Today'" (Heb.3:13).
I know that the Lord has good things in store for you. I'm certainly
going to be praying that this is part of the bridge to all that – and
that it is a short journey to the other side of troubled waters.
Thank you for your strong and courageous attitude in spite of all! That
is a great encouragement and a real witness to me.
Keeping you in my prayers daily,
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #17:
Thanks Bob,
I'm at a loss right now, I have no idea where we are going or what we
are doing. The only thing that is heavy on my heart is I truly do not
want to live like we did for two years homeless. It's just makes my
stomach sink. I think what's the hardest part is seeing the people/
friends/ family hearts so hardened. No care to help, be kind, giving or
have any empathy. I guess it's the times we live in. Good thing we have
GOD and don't have to count on each other. I'm not feeling that energy
right now with excitement to keep moving. It's pretty heavy.
Between trying to keep up with work and all its problems, having to move
and nowhere to go is weighing heavily on me. The market here is not easy
to find a rental and especially finding something we can afford. It's a
double edged sword. We are not opposed to leaving but where do we go
from here? We have no one or don't know anyone. I'm just getting going
on real estate and __ should have his license in a few weeks. After all
this work that we have put into this area to learn the field, it would
be a bummer to have to leave it, but if it's what we need to do then so
be it.
Glad everything is looking better on your end. Thanks for the update.
Response #17:
I'm certainly praying for you all NOT to have to go backwards like that.
I have to believe that this is the Lord moving you on to something
better. I'm sorry that you don't have the time to plan this out since
things are moving fast, but in my experience, sometimes that is when the
Lord opens things up all the more clearly.
When I made the decision to postpone my Classics education to go to
seminary, I moved out to California on a wing and a prayer with most
everything I owned jammed into my little yellow Datsun B210. I hadn't
even been officially accepted, and the scholarship I was hoping for
never materialized. Where was I going to live? Southern CA was expensive
even then. But the Lord provided a cheap room on the top floor of an old
house with two other seminary students in the other two rooms sharing a
bathroom, a refrigerator and a hotplate. I was thrilled to get it, and
it was just the perfect place for me to get through those two years. I
have bounced around a great deal in my life, and the Lord has always
seen to it that I had a safe place to land, NEVER on account of my
"planning". He is absolutely faithful. To the "merciful, blameless and
pure" He always shows Himself the same (Ps.18:25-26).
For You will save the humble people,
But will bring down haughty looks.
Psalm 18:27 NKJV
We can only speculate about what evil things the Lord is delivering you
from by occasioning this move, but we do know that for those who love
Him as you two do, He is working it all out for good.
In Jesus Christ our dear Lord and Savior,
Bob L.
Question #18:
Hello Prof,
How are you sir? Been watching pics of the storm that passed through
near(?) your neck of the woods in KY. This one seems to have been
particularly severe; just checking if you are ok? Your family? My
prayers are with you on this.
In Him,
Response #18:
Good to hear from you! Thanks for asking.
All good here! The storms stopped short of Louisville (the destructive
parts, that is). So we feel VERY blessed, especially given the terrible
disasters southwest of here. This sort of thing happens in these parts.
Before I moved here, a twister set down just two blocks or so away from
where I live, hopped over our neighborhood, and wiped out all the
hundred year plus trees in the park about a mile and a half away.
Things like this make you realize all the more vividly just how little
we are in control – and just how much we need the Lord.
How are new business efforts going?
Keeping you in my prayers daily, my friend.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #19:
Hello Prof,
Indeed we do need the Lord. Over here we are currently faced with a
drought ... but hope persists that He will see us through.
My new business is progressing well. In that regard things have pretty
much calmed down. I now live on my own, far from the RCC-influenced
former neighbourhood. The Lord is great and infinitely loving. My
studies of the Bible are going well too. But testing of a different kind
continues, only I have learned to handle testing much better now, thanks
to your teaching. I am doing Kiswahili for Peter #35. My prayers are
with you.
In Him,
Response #19:
Sorry to hear about the drought, but I'm happy to learn that your own
business efforts are going well.
"Testing of a different kind continues" – it always does, of course. But
this life will come to an end; we will finish our course and "break the
tape". And as long as we keep running strong in spite of all efforts
from the evil one to cut in on us and break our stride, we will reap a
good harvest, and all "this" will have been worth it in the end.
Keep on running, my friend. You are in my prayers daily.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #20:
Thank you letting me know..I really appreciate it.
I hope you have a wonderful New Year too. Robert, I would like to ask
you about church membership or attendance. I don't have a car (long
story for another time) and have called various churches asking for
rides..called 4 that I considered evangelical where I felt that at least
the message would be more as to teaching the Bible without the doctrine
that I believe has killed the church (tho in the past I attended a
catholic charismatic church and felt more love and kindness from them
than many others that I attended), but anyway the churches I contacted
were close to me. One answered my appeal by telling me "We don't do
that." Another I left a message several times because they advertised
that they were a new church offering truth, love and said that they took
anyone in who felt they didn't belong in other churches..so great..right??
They never replied to 4 message I left and suddenly one day I got a
call..I was so excited..when I answered and said hello, they hung up, I
called right back and got a busy signal and left another message and
never got a call back..I did attend one Bible study, I mentioned this
before..I guess my excitement about the things I learned got the better
of me..even the warning that I've seen in the word before you and others
confirmed it, that salvation is not guaranteed once we accept Christ,
but we have to live in it, something I myself have had trouble doing,
well twice they stopped the study (there were at the max 8 people, but
usually 4) and I was told that when they started back up I'd receive a
text; two months went by with texts asking when they were starting up
and I finally decided just to go one Sunday night and found out they had
been meeting for two months minus a week. I was hurt but decided I
needed to keep my beliefs to myself and just enjoy the study..I went for
a year and basically the same thing happened and when I found out that I
was not included again I just decided not to go back..it had turned from
an open Bible study where people could talk about it to one that verses
were read and no room to discuss. ( I have to admit something.. the
Bible study leader got into a car accident..this was the second time no
one told me they had started again..a month went by until I found out
they were already having it again, but when I found out that he was hurt
I made a pan of lasagna for them so his wife wouldn't have to worry
about cooking as she went to visit him in hospital or take him to pt.
She was shocked that I did this..but to me..it should be expected.
Shortly after finding out they had started up...three weeks later I tore
the major ligaments in both my knees and was in terrible pain for three
weeks and no one even sent a text to see if I was okay..I know that if I
was living like my Savior it shouldn't have mattered, but it did and I
just didn't feel welcome there anymore.) I have to admit that there must
be a terrible personality trait I just don't see in myself that really
turns people off, this kind of thing has happened to me all my life. In
Bible school I, being a new Christian believed that everything I owned
was yours and invited all the girls to take whatever they needed (these
are a couple of the worst examples), one night I had come back from
prayer to get ready for chapel that night and found that all of my shoes
were gone and there was one girl left who was wearing my last pair of
shoes so I asked her if I could borrow one of hers. She said that just
because I was so stupid to loan out my belongings to everyone didn't
mean that she should be that stupid to do the same, then she still
walked out with my last pair of shoes. I was scared to death to walk
into chapel with bare feet and prayed that the staff wouldn't know it
and they didn't. In that Bible school, every month for one solid year we
would have a dorm meeting and every girl would confess that they hated
me. I never spoke a word in defense and the dorm mother a staff member
at the school never rebuked them. At chapel service the girls would come
over to me and ask if they could pray for me..I always said yes and they
ALWAYS prayed asking God to help them not hate me as much as they
did..yet I never said no to them asking me if they could pray for me
again. However one night this girl started crying in chapel and I went
to her to hug her, comfort her and pray for her, she tried to speak but
couldn't..so she wrote on a pad of paper that she said out loud that I
was a __ and immediately lost her voice, (it was 3 days before she could
talk again)..and she said it bothered her that I was the only one who
came to pray for her when she was crying so hurtfully. We actually
became friends after that..she was one of only two friends that I had.
I know that there is something wrong with me that causes this to happen
and its happened to me with almost everyone since early childhood so
these instances are not a fluke. I admit that as I have grown older I
have stayed away from people to avoid the tremendous hurt this has
caused me through life..but I do know that God commands us to come
together..I mean how good is a light kept under a bushel? Of course the
other side of that is maybe that I don't have much of a light to begin
with. My children don't see me because they believe I was a terrible
mother and the one that does see me, sees me at Christmas time expecting
me to spend a lot of money..most on credit, getting her kids Christmas
presents which of course I do hoping it will be enough to make a
difference and it never does. I'm terribly broken right now..and
really..I shouldn't even lay this at your feet..please just keep me in
your prayers.
Please have a wonderful holiday and I'm sorry if I've put a damper on
it. You have very enlightened studies and I'm very grateful for them..I
guess my question is how do I continue in fellowship? Thanks!
Response #20:
I'm awfully sorry to hear of all your undeserved troubles, my friend. No
one deserves treatment like this. Sadly, this is "the world", and
Laodicea on top of that. So while I am appalled, I have to say I am not
shocked, having heard many such things before.
First, I don't remember if I ever asked you if you wanted an invite to
the forum of Ichthys readers one of my prospective pastor contacts put
together a couple of years ago. It's not the same thing as meeting face
to face, but a number of readers have reported positive things about it.
Just let me know if you are interested and I would be happy to have him
send you an invitation.
Second, your experience is very topical. I would appreciate being able
to post it (anonymously of course) because I know that it would be an
encouragement to others who have suffered like things, to know that they
are not alone, but also to see how a strong Christian handles this sort
of pressure. Because of the personal nature, I thought I should ask you
about this first, however.
Here's wishing you a wonderful 2022, my friend.
Keeping you in my prayers.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #21:
Yes Robert..you are more than welcome to share this email and YES I would love an invite to this online gathering! Thank you!
Response #21:
OK! I just sent an email to the moderator. Let me know if you haven't
heard back in about a week.
And thanks so much for your willingness to share. As I say, there are a
whole lot of good Christians out there who have been abused and
mistreated by other "Christians" and by their families. Knowing they are
not alone is often a big help.
Keeping you in my prayers.
In Jesus,
Bob L.
Question #22:
Hello Professor,
Thanks for the email. I have indeed already read and worked through
Peter #37(and continue to do so). Great teaching as usual. I also
continued to read and reference your material daily! (Praise to the Lord
for your ministry, and what an incredible resource for the truth of the
Bible) Thank you!
My Bible study group finished up Eschatology in October. it has expanded
from five people to nine, and I am currently leading them through your
BB3B Hamartiology study. Half the group including my wife and I had
Covid so that set us back for a bit, but were still here, so thank God
for the healing and the chance to store up some for more treasures for
heaven! I appreciate your checking on me, love any prayers you can
offer, and will keep trying to tell others the truth that you have led
me to understand from the Bible. (Btw, my wife talked me into being a
counselor for a ninth-grade wilderness camp back in July. I managed on
day three to tear my right quad muscle: apparently, I am not a teen
anymore). I couldn't walk for a week, dodged surgery, was in physical
therapy for three months and on light duty for five months. Just
returned to full duty two weeks ago. But....God was faithful, brought
healing, and my light duty assignment allowed me to be left alone at a
desk where I spent half the day preparing the lessons for the Bible
study!!! (Rms 8:28?) LOL, love it!!
Please pray for my fellow firefighter/medics as many are struggling with
what we have faced over the past two years. We are all just exhausted.
Pray that I may be a good witness for the Lord in a very difficult
environment, were nobody seems to want to ask God for help!
I try to pray for you, your ministry and your work (and protection) at
the University almost daily, along with my brothers and sisters in
Christ on your prayer request list. Looking forward to one day meeting
you, and them, when we all rejoice together with our Lord in the New
Jerusalem!! Come quickly, Lord Jesus! Amen!!
Have a great week!
PS: Thanks for the weekly email posting. I read them every week, and
they are often very encouraging!!
Response #22:
Thanks for the update, my friend. I'm happy to hear that you took such
good advantage from your injury, my friend! I'll be praying for you and
your work situation. Thanks so much for yours too!
And thanks for your enthusiasm for the truth. You are a real
encouragement to me.
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #23:
Hello Dr. Luginbill,
How are you?
I continue to keep you and your ministry in my prayers. I’ve been
reading your email responses this past year so I have a general idea of
how you have been getting through the pandemic. I hope you and your
family are staying safe. My family and I are praying for our country
during this crazy time - I am sure you are, too.
Please forgive me for not writing back to you sooner - it has been over
a year since we corresponded. I have a list of questions I have been
meaning to ask you, but am still working through other topics in my
Bible study. I know you are really busy and didn’t want to bother you
with more questions unless I was ready to integrate your responses into
my notes, but I could have at least sent you an email to say “Hi.” I saw
this email update about your Bibliology study
and meant to write back when I had some time off between Christmas and
New Year’s Day, but fell into a spiritual upheaval around that time and
it's been raging on for the past few weeks. This spiritual crisis is the
main reason why I am writing to you.
A lot has happened since we last corresponded. I didn’t pass the oral
firefighter exam, but they are opening the application process again in
2022. I’ve switched jobs because it was getting too mentally difficult
working from home, but now I am back working from home because of
COVID-19 and doing everything I can not to expose my mom and dad. They
are 1 year from being in their 70’s and both smoked for a long time, so
I do not want to expose them to COVID-19. I had some doubts about how
serious it was at first, but now a few coworkers and friends have gotten
it and it almost killed them. I know everyone in the country is going
through this right now - I can toughen it out until things change.
I’ve been staying active in the Ichthys Fellowship group and have been
consistently joining him, and others for 2 hour long Bible study
sessions via Zoom. This fellowship and their friendship has been a
lifeline to me and I cannot put into words how thankful I am for them.
They are both going to go on to become great Bible teachers, I am sure.
I also started taking a 9 month long Koine Greek class at Beth Messiah
in the fall.
I decided to finally write back to you tonight at the urging of ___.
After our Bible study yesterday I asked them for some prayers for this
issue that I was struggling with. Dr. Luginbill, can you please help me
to sort this out? I am afraid that I’ve sinned so horribly against God
with my mouth that He is going to take my entire ministry and chance at
love away from me. Some of the things I am going to say are so difficult
for me to share with you, but I don’t know how to explain the situation
without sharing them.
[omitted]
Dr. Luginbill, I don’t even know what I am asking you - I am just so
tired of being afraid. I don’t want to be afraid of God anymore. I am so
sorry to be burdening you with this after not writing to you for an
entire year.
In Christ's Love,
Response #23:
I'm happy to hear from you -- I have been wondering how you were doing
for a long time (and was relieved to hear from ___ that you were plugged
into the Zoom sessions).
Of course, however, I am distressed to hear how distressed you are!
First, Jesus loves you. That is not trite. That is not a truism. That is
a fact. That is a WONDERFUL and blessed fact. He loves you more than you
could ever imagine. How much? He died for ALL of your sins. Jesus went
to the cross for YOU. To save YOU. With YOU personally in mind. And when
the darkness fell, He endured unspeakable and unknowable pain to die for
all of yours sins – and the sins of the entire world. Because otherwise,
in the justice of God, YOU could not be saved unless everyone else had
the same opportunity. I have concluded and teach that dying for the
least one of all human sins was greater than all creation and all
history past and present – and that the pain our Lord endured in His
humanity to atone for that one, least sin was greater than the pain all
human beings have experienced from Adam and Eve until the end of the
Millennium. Does Jesus love you? God knows He does!
Second, since Jesus has already died for your sins, you do NOT need to
worry about them. All you need to do is confess them. Especially when we
are talking about things which are not immediately recent, no doubt you
have already confessed these old sins and been forgiven when you did,
long in the past. The fact that you (or I or anyone) can remember our
past failures and make ourselves feel very bad about them does not mean
those sins have not been forgiven. They HAVE been forgiven. Jesus paid
for them at the cross, and God forgave us when we confessed them.
Fretting about them now is of no avail and to no avail. It's only
purpose is to make us sick at heart – just the opposite of the joy and
the peace we are supposed to have in Jesus Christ at all times. That is
why guilt is one of the devil's favorite tactics. He loves to take away
our joy and our peace by reminding us that we are far from perfect. No.
We are NOT perfect. But we have been washed clean by the blood of Christ
– and are made clean again when we confess our sins.
Third, it is true that we do receive divine discipline for our sins. But
read Hebrews chapter twelve and see that its purpose is NOT to make us
feel apprehensive about discipline but rather to reassure us that such
discipline is actually a reassurance that we DO belong to God. He only
spanks us because He loves us, just like the perfect parent, the perfect
Father He is. We are to reverence Him, but we are NEVER to be terrified
of Him. The more we know the Son, the more we know the Father, and the
more we know our blessed God the more we know that He loves us and cares
for us and is only ever trying to help us. He is long-suffering. He is
very patient with us. He never punishes us "as our sins deserve" but
only to show us His great love for us. Also, His discipline is generally
immediate and also unmistakable. That is so we can be helped by it to
correct course wherever that is needful. We are not supposed to walk
around in terror. He loves us and we are to love Him back with all our
heart. That is why love, when perfected, casts out all such fear
(1Jn.4:18).
Blessed is the one whose sin the LORD does not count against them and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD.” And you forgave the guilt of my sin. Therefore let all the faithful pray to you while you may be found; surely the rising of the mighty waters will not reach them. You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.
Psalm 32:2-7 NIV
I am very sorry to hear about the abuse you've suffered in the past, my friend – it was clearly a terrible time for you. I can only tell you that all godly Christians I know personally have scars of various kinds, some self-inflicted, some undeserved, usually some of both. But we all have to learn to let go of the past regardless and push forward in the Christian walk. We are saved. We have been forgiven. Now is our opportunity to respond to the Lord for the great love He has shown to us in what it cost to save us . . . and do what He wants us to do.
Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me."
Matthew 16:24 NKJV
Part of self-denial, an important part, is learning to stop thinking
that we personally are important. We are not. Our entire importance in
truth is bound up in the fact that we belong to Jesus Christ. Once we
get over that hurdle, it's amazing how simple things can become. Once we
start to see that it is not "about me" but about Him, we start to focus
on what pleases Him and leave everything else behind. We are here to
carry our cross – and that means being willing to give up everything and
allow ourselves to be put to death immediately if that is what we are called
upon to do. During the Tribulation, that moment will come for many of
us.
I'm notoriously not good about interpreting "signs" (the things the Lord
has given me in my life have been beyond obvious) and even worse about
predicting the future. As I've probably shared a number of times, my 8th
grade year book used the following to sum me up: "It didn't turn out the
way I expected". That has been the story of my life in many ways. So I
certainly can't tell you what the Lord will or will not do for you or
lead you to, nor how to interpret whatever He has shared with you. I can
testify to things not working the way we anticipate very often, however.
That isn't bad either. In my experience, it's always been very good
(even when, and maybe especially when, it seemed otherwise at the
moment).
I have to tell you the God you talk about in this email doesn't sound
anything like the patient, loving, kind, generous and long-suffering
Father I have come to know in my own Christian walk through this world.
I'm sorry that things are tough for you at the moment – and believe me
when I tell you that you have been in my prayers every day. But please
do consider how much He has done for you. The tokens of His love to you
are many and they are amazing. They are also nothing compared to what is
coming:
But as it is written: "Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him."
1st Corinthians 2:9 NKJV
Christians have to trust the Lord, confident that whatever we are going
through, it WILL all work out "for the good" (Rom.8:28). And we can
appreciate Him and love Him even when the world seems to be falling
apart around us. In fact, not only is that more necessary at such times,
but such times can be the most spiritually blessed ones in our lives.
God forgives you ___. I'm no priest confessor, but I do know the Word of
God. He says He forgives you, and He never lies.
This is a difficult test you are going through, but you do know in your
heart of hearts that the Lord is faithfully bringing you through it. Is
it taking a good deal longer than you had ever imagined? That is not
unusual. Abraham had to wait until he was a hundred for his heir to be
born. But God faithfully fulfilled every promise made.
"Behold, this day I am going the way of all the earth. And you know in all your hearts and in all your souls that not one thing has failed of all the good things which the LORD your God spoke concerning you. All have come to pass for you; not one word of them has failed."
Joshua 23:14 NKJV
When we stand before Jesus on that great day, these words will be shown
to have been true for all of us. The only question is, do we trust Him
enough to see that truth with the eyes of faith now?
I am confident that you will rally spiritually, my friend. You are a
fine Christian warrior and you have fought a wonderful fight thus far.
Be pleased to rebuke all fear and anger and entrust yourself instead the
infinite mercies and love of our dear Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
This I recall to my mind,
Therefore I have hope.
Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
They are new every morning;
“The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,
“Therefore I hope in Him!”
The LORD is good to those who wait for Him,
To the soul who seeks Him.
It is good that one should hope and wait quietly
For the salvation of the LORD.
It is good for a man to bear
The yoke in his youth.
Let him sit alone and keep silent,
Because God has laid it on him;
Let him put his mouth in the dust—
There may yet be hope.
Let him give his cheek to the one who strikes him,
And be full of reproach.
For the Lord will not cast off forever.
Though He causes grief,
Yet He will show compassion
According to the multitude of His mercies.
Lamentations 3:21-32 NKJV
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.
Question #24:
Hello, Dr. Luginbill,
Thank you for keeping me in your prayers. I have been re-reading your
email all week - thank you for your comforting and encouraging words.
I'm still struggling with anxiety over this and need some more time this
weekend to sort out my thoughts. I will email you again this weekend.
I am keeping you in my prayers, too - I hope you had a good week.
In Christ's Love,
Response #24:
I'm happy to hear this was some help to you, my friend!
You are a wonderful Christian, and I know the Lord has plans for you,
plans for good, for building you up and not tearing you down
(Jer.29:11).
You have a right – a birthright – to be joyful in our dear Lord Jesus
Christ.
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
Philippians 4:4 NIV
In our Savior,
Bob L.
Question #25:
Hello Dr. Luginbill,
Thank you for responding to my distressing email I sent last week. I
apologize for giving you so many details about past relationships. I
could have just said “they were abusive” and left it at that, but being
so emotional when I wrote the email I went into too much detail.
I am still really struggling. I am having a really difficult time even
reading God’s Word right now. I know that I am forgiven because that is
what God’s Word says, but I cannot bear up under the discipline I think
God is giving to me because of ___. I am afraid of Him. All I can feel
right now is grief and fear.
[omitted]
In Christ’s Love,
Response #25:
No worry about "details" – I won't be sharing any of them, and I have
heard much worse (often).
I think it is a mistake to be anticipating discipline and specifically
fearing a particular type of discipline like the one you mention – which
in my estimation is very unlikely and completely disproportionate.
For one thing, we are told to confess and that we ARE forgiven when we
do (1Jn.1:9). As David said, "Blessed is he whose transgression is
forgiven, whose sin is covered" (Ps.32:1 NKJV) – and he should know. And
we are told that the Father comports Himself towards us in discipline as
a loving father does towards his beloved children (Heb.12:1ff.). Now
what loving father would cripple his child for all time because of some
misconduct? Parents "make it hurt" but the hurt is temporary and given
in love in order to avoid future misbehavior. It seems to me that you
are confusing potential loving punishment (which has probably already
come and gone – my best guess is that your spiritual discomfort IS the
discipline) with the sin unto death. Let me remind you that the latter
only comes to those who are involved in gross misconduct which they
refuse to confess and give up. The Christian life is all about trust –
trust in the Lord. He has promised you forgiveness in His Word, and has
also promised that discipline is measured, reasonable and bearable. I
beg you to accept those truths.
What you "did" is something Christ died for. If you had "done" something
similar to me, I would forgive you. How much more won't the Lord who
loves you do so! How much more will He not do so, He who already died
for these and all your sins on the cross . . . so that you might be
saved, so that you might grow, so that He might bless you in this life
and the next?
David did FAR worse by any measurement. He committed adultery with the
wife of a trusted and trusting subordinate and then had him murdered to
cover it up. Did God take away his kingship? No. Not permanently. And of
course in fact the line of the Messiah comes down through Bathsheba.
David did experience some of the most intense and long lasting divine
discipline recorded in scripture, things we shudder to contemplate – but
he didn't lose what was most important to him.
As I read scripture, God doesn't "take away forever" important things in
discipline. Rather, He adds discipline to what we already have. To get
our attention. To help us straighten out. Just like a perfect parent
would do for the good of a beloved child.
I can't speak to signs. What I know from scripture is all posted to the
site (see "Guidance of the Spirit"), but I don't dismiss what others
have experienced. I only ever emphasize that if what we have been given
is in accord with what we could figure out from scripture anyway, then
it is valid, but if not, then we need to reconsider. My own experiences
have all been in the nature of encouragement.
We all have to remember that this world is a battlefield, and that our
resolve will be tested. When things are going sideways, it's very easy
for the devil to use our guilt over this or that mistake to get us
completely off track. Look how he eventually even got to Job (though not
without human help – he uses that too). We have to accept that if we are
suffering or experiencing trouble, that this is the world and sometimes
the Lord allows this testing. Abraham became impatient waiting for his
heir and that resulted in trouble and possibly delay. And when he had
enjoyed Isaac for some years, the Lord told him to give him up – not to
actually take him away, but so that Abraham could demonstrate that he
loved the Lord even more than the gift.
Love the Giver with all your heart, my friend, and everything else will
fall into place.
Keeping you in my prayers daily, my friend.
In Jesus Christ our loving and merciful Savior,
Bob L.
Question #26:
Hello Dr. Luginbill,
I hope you and your family have been well. I apologize, again, for
taking a long time to write back - I just needed a little more time to
think about your response and pray. I am still really struggling with
anxiety over this. I have been re-reading your email for reassurance,
but I am not able to shake this fear of discipline.
I think the problem is coming from me not being able to comprehend what
kind of discipline would be “measured, reasonable and bearable.” I
understand “measured” but I don’t know how to judge what God thinks is
“reasonable” and “bearable” - He knows my breaking limit, but I don’t.
Other than natural consequences of sin, these are the other times I am
sure I have experienced God’s discipline since I found Ichthys seven
years ago:
[omitted]
I completely understand God disciplining David by taking his son away
from him (I’m surprised He didn’t take Bathsheba from him too) and I
understand how his sin could have set an example for his other sons and
influenced their future behavior which tore his family apart and led to
Absalom rebelling. Like I said in my first email, I am pretty sure the
HS is guiding me to look at all three scenarios: Saul losing his
kingship, Moses not being allowed to enter the promised land and Nathan
confronting David about his sin.
Can you help me understand how and why God disciplined Saul by taking
away his kingship and why He wouldn’t let Moses into the Promised Land
for striking the rock? I know I am not a David or Moses by any
measurement, but it seems like God can be very very harsh with certain
individuals and in some situations.
Please keep praying for God to have mercy on me and not take these
future blessings from me. I will continue to keep your and your family
in my prayers, too
In Christ’s Love,
Response #26:
First, when we talk about "bearable", in terms of discipline I don't think we should be worrying that things will be "worse than we could have ever imagined but technically bearable even though we don't think so". In fact, we shouldn't be worrying at all. I don't know how good or bad your parents are/were. But we certainly all have the image of what a perfect parent would be like. And a perfect parent would deal with us in love, not coddling us so that we don't learn necessary life lessons, but always having our best in mind, wanting the best for us, doing the best for us. THAT is our heavenly Father, and so much better in fact that we cannot even imagine it. If you were a parent and if you were trying your best to bring your kids up right, wanting them to turn out right so not spoiling them but delighting in them, you would be appalled to hear that one of them had told his/her teacher, "I'm terrified that my mom is going to do something terrible to me for breaking that vase! I can't even sleep at night, I'm so afraid about what she may do to me!"
The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him
Psalm 103:8-13 NKJV
In terms of specific discipline, I am not in the place of God, of
course, but as I have said before, and as the incidents you have shared
confirm to me, in my observation and experience, if we are talking about
a specific reaction to a specific sin, that almost always comes quickly
and is unmistakably related. If little Johnny deliberately busts a vase,
good-mom is probably going to paddle him right then and there. She's NOT
going to pretend like nothing is wrong . . . and then chop off his
little finger three months later when he's not expecting it. And if
little Johnny swears at his mother and screams, "I hate you!" (get
prepared for that one, by the way, if you intend to be a parent), she's
NOT going to take him out back, pour gas on him and set him on fire . .
. even if some people might think that's "reasonable". Don't forget, mom
LOVES little Johnny, more than her own life, and would do absolutely
anything for him. That is why she spanks him, so that he'll turn out
right and be spared the trouble that comes to undisciplined children; if
she DIDN'T really love him, she'd spare the rod (Prov.13:24). If
good-mom acts this way, how much more will our perfect Father not act
towards you and me and us all in great patience and mercy? After all, He
put to death His own beloved Son in order to save us. Now that we belong
to Him, His mercy and love is greater, not less – for we were bought
with the greatest possible price.
As to these three famous men of the Bible:
1) As to David, it is true in scripture that "to whom much is given,
much is expected" (Lk.12:48). David was exceptional in many ways. He was
given to write more Psalms than anyone else, some of the most beloved
parts of the entire scripture. He was taken from the sheepfold to be
king over all of Israel. He was given some of the most fantastic
military victories and glory in all of history. He had everything a man
could ever imagine or dream of, including many wives and children, great
power and authority, great riches . . . AND one of the best and closest
personal relationships with the Lord of any believer who's ever lived.
In other words, any way one chooses to look at it, he was clearly in a
different category than we are. Not that any of us is limited by the
grace of God. We can all aspire to being as great as David and as
blessed as David . . . but that takes working on our relationship with
the Lord in very intense and consistent ways, obviously. When David
sinned, it was "a doozie". To go back to the analogy, breaking mom's
vase out of anger and telling her you hate her is on a far different
level than stabbing your sibling to death with a pair of scissors in the
middle of the night. The latter is akin to what David did, and would
obviously occasion drastic measure we don't even want to consider. David
committed murder and stole the murdered man's wife. And yet, while the
first child born of him to Bathsheba died, and while one of his sons
killed another for raping his sister and then died subsequently after
attempted to kill his father – pretty bad stuff – David did not lose his
kingship in the end, or his wealth, or his other wives and children –
and didn't even have to give up Bathsheba . . . and the line of the
Messiah comes through her as we know. So while David received very harsh
discipline, he never lost his relationship with the Lord. He confessed
and returned to the Lord in all humility, and the Lord restored him. So
we can be confident that no matter "how bad" we have sinned, that
doesn't mean that the Lord is withholding His love from us, and it
doesn't mean that we won't be restored entirely, even if we are hurt and
suffer some loss for what we have done. God certainly could have struck
David with a thunderbolt after Nathan confronted him. But He didn't. To
do that to someone for very much less, would be completely out of
keeping with the ways of the most loving Parent of all.
2) Moses: Again, to whom much is given . . . Moses was given to write
the first five books of the Bible. And he was given to be the ruler of
all of Israel for more than forty years. In terms of reward, while I
don't know it for certain, I think it very likely that he and Elijah are
the two who will be privileged to be at Christ's right and left hand for
all eternity. Rewards don't come better than that. True, he was not
allowed to enter the land at that time because of what he did in not
following the strict instructions of the Lord, hitting the Rock when in
the second iteration the representation was of Christ in resurrection
rather than at the cross. But consider that while he longed for it,
entering the land at that time was still a struggle. And consider also
that the plan of God was well served by Joshua, another type of Christ,
managing the entrance. And consider as well that Moses still did not
lose anything. As a result of this, he will be one of the two witnesses
during the Tribulation, and will indeed enter the land, preside over the
rebuilding of the temple along with Elijah, as well as the ministry of
the 144,000 bringing many in Israel to repentance. And that is better by
far than switching places with Joshua. So in both of these two cases,
while there are "lumps and bumps", the end is better than the beginning
in spite of the failure, the production of the line of the Messiah in
the first case, the restoration of Israel in preparation for the Messiah
in the second.
3) Saul: This is clearly very different. David loved the Lord with all
his heart. So did Moses. But not Saul, as we see from all of his actions
and all of his words. And THAT is the difference. It really isn't about
the discipline at all but the person being disciplined. If little Johnny
is a "bad seed", then there is very little that good-mom can do in the
end, no matter how she frets over him, no matter how carefully tailored
the discipline is. We all have free will. But for those of us who DO
love the Lord, and who ARE willing to return to Him after we stray,
throwing ourselves on His ineffable mercy like the prodigal son, there
is complete restoration. The prodigal son lost nothing in the end. And
neither will we if we are determined to love the Lord our God with all
of our hearts and minds and strength. He definitely loves us. The only
question really is, are we willing to love Him back, even just a little?
So love Him back! And rejoice in Him! And boast in the cross through
which you have been crucified to the world and the world to you!
I can't judge anyone else' experiences. But I am guessing that in the
first place the Lord did not appear to you and make any audible promise
to you . . . and that in the second place He didn't appear to you and
tell you He was "taking it back". He's not a God who takes things back.
If He means for you to have a family and children, that will happen, and
nothing in this world, seen or unseen, can stop that from happening. Not
even big mistakes you may make. Those only cause pain and trouble and
delay.
So be pleased to take my advice, my friend. Stop beating yourself up.
You've confessed, so you've been forgiven. If there were any major
discipline coming your way, it most likely would already have begun. And
it seems to me that the horrors you've already put yourself through may
well have proven to be "discipline enough" (that is often the case where
truly good Christians are concerned). It's high time to move on and
begin again to delight yourself in the Lord. Whatever is good and
needful, He will bring it to pass in due time.
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
Philippians 4:4 NIV
In the love of Jesus Christ our dear Savior who died for all we have
done.
Bob L.
p.s., I am indeed continuing to keep you in my prayers about this
(Num.6:26; 2Thes.3:16).
Question #27:
Hello Dr. Luginbill,
Thank you for emailing me back again. Your responses have really helped
me to turn the corner this week and let go of the fear that God would
discipline me in this way.
[omitted]
I think once everything
thaws out here in Ohio and I can get back to running and walking outside
I will sleep better. My job is very “mind-numbing” and repetitive,
staring at a computer screen all day, so it's been difficult to focus
long enough to write back to you during the week. I’ve been driving
around the city after work and listening to Curt’s studies and
apologetic videos on YouTube
[link] just to get some of this nervous energy out. Also, my parents
both got their first round of COVID-19 vaccinations yesterday. Once they
get the 2nd jab and develop full immunity I will be able to start
getting up early and doing Bible study at Starbucks again and going back
to the gym.
God did bless my sister and I with really good parents. But, my mom and
dad would threaten to take away privileges if my sister and I didn’t get
good grades or if we got into trouble - We both got straight A’s (maybe
a “B” here and there) all through school. When I got into arguments with
my parents as a teenager, they would threaten to take away my art
lessons. So, after ___, it is easy for me to think that He would take
away this future blessing.
Your analogy comparing God to the “good mother” was very helpful. I
don’t want to underplay my sin, but maybe I had a distorted view of how
bad it was (of course, all sin is damaging and dangerous). ___ feels
like I stabbed someone with a pair of scissors, even though I know,
objectively, it's not the same. I don’t know if it is the guilt or the
Holy Spirit, but every time I sin badly (enough to incur discipline) I
really think God reflects my sin back at me for a few weeks so I know
exactly what He is punishing me for. Also, your explanations for why God
disciplined David, Moses and Saul helps put my situation and sin into
perspective.
[omitted]
I have not been the best at waiting for these past 6 years. Patience is
definitely not a personality trait I have a lot of, either. There have
been so many days and weeks of doubt, then rallying, then more doubt,
with the Holy Spirit encouraging me to keep focused on my workouts,
Bible and language studies through all of it. This last bout of horrible
doubt that led to me sinning in my anger and frustration was the worst.
I started to get really positive signs last week and this week regarding
___ - the Holy Spirit is even “echoing” your words that it would be
“very unlikely and completely disproportionate” for Him to do so. He’s
encouraging me to get back up and “get back in the race” but my “faith
legs” are still a little shaky.
[omitted]
Thank you, again, Dr. Luginbill, for your patience in responding to me
and waiting for me to respond. Please let me know if there is anything
specific I can pray for you and your family.
In Christ’s Love,
Response #27:
I'm very relieved to hear all of this, my friend. I knew for certain
that you would rally in your faith – just as I knew for certain that the
Lord would do as He has done and encourage you to persevere.
As the KJV says, "now we see through a glass, darkly" (1Cor.13:12). We
have to navigate through this dense fog called life using the Word as
our compass. We have to trust the Lord that we're being guided through
His Spirit to the right haven – and not being led onto the rocks.
Blessedly, He is absolutely faithful, and worthy of our complete trust.
And if we ever get confused about that, all we need to do is look to the
cross: having done that for us, we have no worries about Him doing
whatever else we need in this life (easier for Him by far than dying for
our sins!).
He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
Romans 8:32 NIV
In Jesus our dear Savior,
Bob L.